In my last post, I mentioned how wonderful it is to link back up with important people from my youth. During an exchange of emails with my friend Bill, he apologized for an incident that occurred one night when we were out together where he believed he had offended me. I have absolutely no memory whatsoever of what he was talking about…and still don’t even after he explained it to me. Yet, he recalls every aspect of the situation, knows exactly where we were standing, what we said and what happened the rest of the night. He remembers it like it was yesterday.
His confession spurred me on to make a confession of my own and seek his forgiveness over an incident that I was responsible for creating. It is the greatest regret I have pertinent to our years of friendship together. I have always felt bad for having mistreated him for a reason I can’t recall. The funny part is, Bill has no memory whatsoever of the incident I was confessing to. This exchange of confessions led to us both to the same conclusion. I hope he doesn’t mind, but I want to quote his email because it reflects the valuable life’s lesson we both learned.
Bill said, “It is really important how we treat others vs. how they treat us. Neither of us seem to recall or care about what happened to us but we seem to really care about what we did to each other. Wow! That's powerful. We could make an entire sermon out of this one.”
I couldn’t agree more heartily with Bill. Life is too short to hang onto regrets or guilt over something that we have done that may have offended a loved one. Please consider this lesson and do whatever you can to make things right with the people who care for you and who you care for.
”Forbearing one another, and forgiving one another, if any man have a quarrel against any: even as Christ forgave you, so also do ye.” - Colossians 3:13 (KJV)
My very dear sister in Christ, Nancy, inspired me early in my marriage and walk with the Lord, to do all we can to fix, mend and reach out to others even if we’ve not instigated a rift or uncomfortable feelings with another. As I’ve desperately sought after God’s heart on such matters through Scripture, and had the profound privilege of sitting under such excellent preaching over the years, I find this mindset to be absolutely true. The requirement of vulnerability at times although a bit unsettling is mandatory. Even with the possibility of rejection, which no human is ever fond of, we need to pursue. The first part of the desired end result would be the question, “Why bother?” “Let them go on with their miserable attitude.” We are called to be a strange and peculliar people. (some more than others 🙂 ) There is a time to let go, and love from a distance. The less that happens between believers – the better. I’ve been fortunate to learn from the best – one being my Victor. Shhh…don’t tell him though..
Beautiful